Produce Productivity
by zabbini
Summary: Peggy and Lafayette adventures in the grocery store.


"I knew I should have brought my sunglasses. Why did I let you talk me out of bringing my sunglasses?"

Peggy Schuyler had just brought her hair to the front of her dress with irritation as the automatic doors opened to the produce store. She had also just addressed her question to the tall, bumbling man on her left by the name of Lafayette.

"Because, my love, we are going inside. Our entire purpose for leaving the house is to stroll around another building _inside_. Why would you need to bring glasses to protect you from the sun?"

"You know very well why," she hissed, not nearly as bothered as she was playing at. He was just fun to fluster. "Now I am not presentable for the security cameras, and you are entirely to blame."

With that, she raised her small chin in the air with mock hauteur and strutted her way over the threshold. Lafayette looked toward the heavens for just a moment before his purpose for being on earth reared its head and he began trailing after his wife, holding her purse.

(Have no doubt about it, they still posed for the security cameras as though they were Bonnie and Clyde until they received at least four curious looks. Then the shopping could begin.)

"It seems I have butter, milk, and cheese. What are you getting?"

While she waited for his reply, Peggy placed her chewed pen cap back into her mouth to circle her responsibilities. Lafayette always teased her for chewing on caps; he said it was why her insults were so cutting-she had been sharpening her teeth for years. He wasn't wrong.

He glanced down at the list and let out a breathless laugh, along with, "Just about everything else ' _it seems_ '." His laugh grew louder as her free hand whacked him across the chest. "Though I suppose it is good. We both know I will find each item two times over before you can complete your first search." Now there was a mischievous glint in his eyes. She was witnessing the beautiful birth of a challenge, Peggy thought.

"Lafayette," she hummed, looking up into his brown eyes with an eyebrow raised, "Your last statement was itching to be challenged. Was that your intention? If so, I am humbly at your service."

He merely grinned.

(The list fell to the floor forgotten as the two fools in love darted to opposite sides of the grocery store, dodging baskets and children alike. Peggy snagged many handhelds and began placing them in precarious places down the aisles she knew a certain Frenchman would wander. Lafayette placed her much needed items on the very highest shelf with labels turned to the back. They both met at the register panting, with matching exasperated smiles as they bought two of everything and ruled it a tie. The grocer owed the manager ten dollars for the outcome.)

"Oh! Pumpkins! Pumpkins are orange!"

Peggy reached for the aforementioned fruit from her seat in the basket in vain. Their current mission was to locate everything edible in the store that was orange, and that they could find a justification for buying. Just because. Lafayette smiled from his position at the helm of the basket that doubled as Peggy's ride.

"We are going to Thomas and Angelica's tomorrow night for dinner," he reasoned, already leaning down and placing it beside her in the cart, "We will need something to bring. What do you say to pumpkin pie?"

Peggy kissed his cheek as his finger brushed her upper thigh before she replied, "That sounds lovely."

Lafayette steered her down the aisle better than he could drive his Honda, the both of them receiving dirty looks as Peggy's shouts of "Cheetos! Cheetos are orange!" faded into the aisle behind them.

"The total is now fourteen."

Peggy scowled as she took the pack of gum out of Lafayette's hand where it had just caught the refreshments from hurtling toward the ground.

"I have _not_ knocked over fourteen items today. That's absurd." His restrained laughter was his only response, only succeeding in making her more defensive. "Lafayette!" A whack on the arm. "I repeat, fourteen items is _absurd_."

Her husband nudged her down the narrow checkout aisle with care, but for her person or the surrounding racks of candy Peggy was not able to tell. His response was smooth as he said,

"I am not denying that it is absurd, my love. I am simply saying it is also true."

As Peggy slid the credit card to pay, he tried to kiss her temple with eyes full of amusement. She masterfully avoided his affection with a side glance, but was pleased with herself for communicating her playfulness; he merely laughed and bagged the groceries.

"Phone number?"

Peggy and Lafayette were jolted out of the world designed for them alone, and back into reality. The grocer (Theodosia, Peggy idly noted) smiled at Peggy's falter, and repeated her question with a similar amount of amusement in her eyes.

"Use Eliza's," Lafayette advised her, "Alexander will consider the points the most thoughtful of gifts-you know how he is with money."

Peggy rolled her eyes but could not deny her husband's accuracy; Alexander was nothing if not careful with money. He would notice the few extra points immediately, and they very well might make his week.

The youngest Schuyler sister finished paying and turned to an equally accomplished Lafayette with his task.

"To the house?" He prompted, somehow managing to loop his arm through hers and push the grocery-laden basket down to the car. "I plan on showering my wife with affection as I get drunk off of hot chocolate and watch the last episode of _Friends_ for the twenty fourth time."

He looked over at her to find her already staring. She stopped their progress, right there in the middle of the street, and pulled him down for a kiss on the chin, the nose, and at last the forehead before sinking into his arms for a hug. There was no place more safe or warm, she had decided time and again, than in the circle of Lafayette's arms. She thanked the gods every night that this goofy, childish, strong, and loving man had allowed her to burrow under his skin for shelter, nestle in his rib cage for protection, and settle in his heart as home.

"Home," she answered his question and repeated the thought in her head. "My favorite place."

His smile lit up the dark street, and Peggy wondered which galaxy he had been created from, and if the stardust in his veins was missed everyday by a burning, woefully incomplete star.

 _fin_


End file.
